I Shaved My Legs For This?

Ramblings

2005-08-02T21:51:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I have no posted in a really long time. Bad Ray! I must get better about this.

Here are some goings-on with me.

1. I am still getting a lot of freelance writing assignments--yay for Ray--but my trademark impatience (Wha? Ray? Impatient? Me? NEVER! Yeah, right) stresses me out. I hate waiting 3 months to get paid. I hate waiting 3 months to see my article. I got my impatience from my father--the most impatient man ever. It's like, "Okay, I am done with the article. Print now!" I save EVERYTHING I have ever written. I can't wait!

2. Kathy, my shrink, is a lifesaver. For starters, she never acts like I'm wacky. Secondly, she thinks it's cool that I write. Third, she dresses funky which is a trait I like in a shrink. Fourth, she remembers everything I tell her.

3. I still have like, no money to my name. I temp and freelance but when will I start rolling in the dough? Oy.

4. I am starting a new temp job; long term, this week. BUT I need to take a urine test before I start; a drug test. No biggie, right? WRONG! About a month-month-and-a-half ago, I did smoke a tiny bit of marijuana with Michael. Just a TINY bit. I have smoked three times in my entire life. Ever. And NEVER in college. So, naturally, I am freaking out. It's been about 34 days since the last puffing incident, and I drink tons of juice and water, so I should be okay, but if they find any trace of pot in my system; I'm fucked. The sad part is, I NEVER smoke...just those 3 times in my whole life. And never to the extent of being stoned. So many people smoke dope, and little me, who never touched a cigarette and rarely even drinks alcohol is gonna be penalized if something is found in my pee? I called Michael and he told me to go to GNC and buy this vitamin that will flush out my system, just in case. So, I did. But keep fingers crossed for me...I'm NO druggie. If I lose a job because I smoked dope a month ago--and I only took like two puffs--than that's NOT fair. Writers are known to smoke dope, be alcoholics and crazy. Hopefully they will go easy on me.

5. You all knew this one was coming...Michael and I are still not together. We still bicker like a married couple in a way that shows that we still really care about each other. We still talk on the phone and IM. We still text-message. We still care about each other. We have a good, mutual friend. One of my best friends live two buildings down from him in NYC. Our best friends are dating each other and *WE* set them up! Michael will always be two-degrees from me. A tiny part of me still believes that I will end up with Michael, someday. But it's dumb. The whole dichotomy of our relationship is dumb. What's even dumber is that Michael and I are both really nice people. And nice people belong together. However, I met another guy online--named, Mike, ironically--who seems really cool. We are hitting it off in the cyber world. But I'm playing hard to get with him and won't give him my number yet. But if he asks me out--hell yeah--I'll meet him. I can't sit on my tuchus and wait for Mike #1 to come back around. I wait for no man. A-men. But...I refuse to believe we are FULLY over. Mike (#1) is kind of like the Big to my Carrie, the Ross to my Rachel. :)

And that's a wrap for tonight.

PG

2005-06-13T20:25:00.000-07:00

Today was so hot in NYC I had a migraine all day long even though I chugged water all day. I was talking like a zombie in therapy because it was so hot. Somehow I got stuck in Times Square when they announced the Michael Jackson verdict. A CBS camerman scanned over me (I made sure I got front and center so I could get on TV...I am such a ham sometimes...) when he was scanning the reaction of the crowd. But I wasn't on TV tonight...

I really don't care if Jackson is innocent or not. I have more important stuff on my mind like dealing with my nagging parents who always seem to enjoy rubbing it in my face that I don't have any health benefits. Or writing bullshit magazine articles.

I was assigned an article tonight on college fraternities. Okay. My college did not have any Greek life. I know NOTHING about frats and sororities so I turned the article down. I'm sorry but I'm so sick of writing about stuff I could really give a rat's ass about. But no, I was VERY nice about everything. I just told my editor -- sorry! -- I know NOTHING about Greek life and didn't think it was fair that I was given a huge assignment to write in two weeks on a topic that's Greek to me!! (I'm sorry--I couldn't resist)

I have to be really careful because I can feel myself getting depressed this week. I just know it. I know when my anxiety is kicking in because I can't sit still and I just start calling everyone in my phone book looking for someone to talk to--anyone--and then when I do talk to someone I pretend everything is fine. But it's not. I'm really unhappy lately with everything. It sucks because just when I thought that I was doing so much better, I started getting all depressed again today. I am just sick and tired of being so nice and so sweet to everyone and having everyone shit and poop on me in return. Being nice sucks the life out of me.

I'm going to shower and go to bed. I feel like filling up the tub with bubbles to the brim and skimming a bullshit magazine. I just want to fall through the floor and vanish for a little while. Maybe make people miss me the way I miss them.

I feel like I'm not good at anything and that everything in my life just sucks. My friends are all going away for the summer; I don't have any money or a steady job; I'll be 26 in three weeks and will do anything to be a kid again; I don't have a significant other; no one ever calls me back...Ugh, I just hate the world today.

I'm a loser, baby

2005-06-12T23:17:00.000-07:00

I go to Long Island almost every weekend. WOW, I am such a nerd. Really. I guess because I am single it just makes sense. And my three best friends are on Long Island. I guess I like escaping from Manhattan.

I have to write an article on skincare for a magazine. It feels like torture. Okay. So, let me tell you. I have written a BILLION articles on sunblock.Why do I have yet ANOTHER one???? I should *be* a fucking dermatologist already. How many times do I need to tell teens to use sunblock??? SPF this and SPF that and wear a hat! Avoid wrinkles... I feel like a moron. This is REALLY my 7th article on sunblock. Snooze. How will I ever be published in Vanity Fair if editors keep asking me to write about moisturizers? Let's all say it together now....UGH!!! When do I get to write about something cool that I actually have an interest in? If another editors makes me write about sunblock I swear to God, I'm going to shove some pink ZINK up their noses. No more sunblock articles! I can spell. I know CHICAGO's stupid manual of style. I am well-educated. I am smarter than this! Do teens really give a shit about sunblock? Teens just want to get laid, dye their hair blonde and go to college. They won't even read this article unless Jessica Simpson was mentioned in it and she's NOT.

Anyway. This weekend I was on LI, naturally. Where the F else would I be? (Okay, to be fair, I was in Boston last weekend visiting my girlies Sara and Laurie) But I got to hang with Jen and Gina and we had a great time just catching up and talking at this small bar in Huntington. It was a really nice night. Very chill. My days of bar-hopping, etc...partying...I don't know. I know I can act like an old lady sometimes but I really can't deal with a crowded bar and cheesey LI people with fake titties and gross bleached blonde hair and tans. So this RED bar we went to was PERFECT for us.

Sunday I slept late and then helped my parents plant flowers in the backyard. Naturally, my allergies were a mess. I got back into NYC around 10 and have been working on my bullshit sunblock article ever since. I took a five minute break to Dunkin' Donuts where I bought myself a chocolate doughnut and bit my lip AND the inside of my cheek while eating it. GREAT. A fat lip to add to my night. Just what I need! I hate when that happens. It hurts like a total bitch. I hope labor is not this painful.

OK, gonna finally go to sleep.

PS Some gay guy on the LIRR told me I looked like Taylor Dane. Should I be scared or flattered???

In a pickle

2005-05-31T07:12:00.001-07:00

Ooooooh, boy.

So my Memorial weekend was pretty uneventful. It was full of surprises, but overall...good.

Friday night Jen, her college friend Helen and I went to a Mexican restaurant for drinks called, "Blockhead." It was not far from my old apartment. We had margaritas. I realized that certain drinks are just a little too heavy for my stomache. I can only sip sangria, margaritas, etc...weird. Not that I'm a big drinker but, you know. With my allergies so atrocious I can't taste much anyway. But we had a lot of fun. Then we went to a great dessert place called "Fluff" where I had an amazing chocolate cupcake. I brought an extra one home (to LI) for my father or brother and naturally it was Jackie and Alyssa who ended up eating it. It was a good night. I was a little tipsy but by the time Jen and I made it to the LIRR we were both sobered up and fine.

Saturday, my neurotic-anal mother woke me up at 9am (too early!) and asked me to help her out with my grandparents. So I rolled out of bed, pulled on my jeans, managed to smear some makeup on my face and headed out the door with her. We took my grandparents shopping. While I was walking around Kohl's with my grandfather, my cell phone rang and it was Jared. We got disconnected. When the phone rang around 5 minutes later, I assumed it would be Jared. But it was...GUESS. We ended up hanging out but it made me sad (in a bittersweet way) and I miss 'us' but the kid won't TAAAAALK to me. We'll be cutesey and flirty but UGHHHH.

I am so tired of the b/s that men give women. I am so sick of M not opening up to me--I swear, I have to pull teeth with him. I'm a JOURNALIST! Talk to me, dammit. I'm not a mind-reader.
Ugh, I hate men. I'm not going to turn this into an M vent session, so I'm cutting this post off right here: ______________.

Sleepy

2005-05-25T21:09:00.000-07:00

Why am I always up late? Most of my friends are in bed asleep by like, 9:30. But not Rachel! No, no. I am freaking up on my computer almost every single night until 1ish. YES--I am mostly writing. BUT I really should be in bed earlier. What the hell is wrong with me? Nobody answer that! This a hypothetical question!

It is so ugly and depressing today in NYC. I decided to rush tickets to an Broadway show and settled on, "Steel Magnolias." Jackie came with me. I used my college ID and only paid $20 for my orchestra seat. Good thing I still look really young and can use my college ID for discounts. Jackie and I were the youngest people in the theatre but who cares???

UGHHHHH then I met Gina and Adrienne for dinner which was fun but the UGGGHHH is that after I left the restauarnt I had a serious tummy ache.

I am a hyppocrite

2005-05-23T22:20:00.000-07:00

Okay, so what the fuck is Tom Cruise's PROBLEM? First of all, I was watching Oprah today and all I could think about was how annoying Tom Cruise was on her show. He was on something. Seriously. He was jumping around all excited about shitty/bitchy 'actress' Katie Holmes. I don't read the gossip magazines anymore--really--but we all know Tom and Katie are one icky couple. Tom was bouncing around the Oprah set like a child and it just irked the crap out of me. Katie, LOVED you in First Daughter, babe! Where did you put that Oscar?

Katie Holmes....UGH. First of all, I know people who have interviewed Katie and she's a TOTAL B I T C H. This is no secret. A lot of reporters have commented about her including one of my editors. I have worked at a total of 5 entertainment magazines and every colleague that worked with KH complained about her Ohio attitude. She is anti-social and unfriendly and hard to work with. My friend Lana saw her at "Brother Jimmy's" -- this penis bar (read: Sports Bar men go to in NYC with the sole intention of a one-night stand with a woman) near my apartment and said Katie was totally bitchy and grunted at anyone who came near her. Yeah, that's classy. Tom you can HAVE her. Ugh. My boss at an unnamed magazine also showed me Katie's before pictures at a photo shoot...eeeeeeeeeek. She LOOKS funny with him...no? They look like they don't belong together.

Tom Cruise and his stupid smirk annoy me so much I'm going to stop talking about him right...NOW.

I have a mouse in my apartment. He thinks he's goddam Stewart Little the way he prances around my tiny apartment likes he owns it. I almost expect to come home from work and find him watching my TV, sitting on my couch and smoking a cigar. Effin' rodent. My sister and I want to move. Our apartment is a serious dump. Anyone reading this--don't visit me. I'll visit you. I hate this shitbox I call home.

I interviewed Rue McClanahan this morning for am-NY! She was so nice. She played "Blanche" on the "Golden Girls" and now she is starring in "Wicked" on Broadway. She was telling me a little about her cancer treatment...it was sad. She also told me she fell last year and totally threw out her back. She also told me a random story about how she got food poisoning from hospital food once. It was cute. I liked talking to her. She lives in NYC -- which I never knew -- and she writes short stories in her spare time. But when I went over my notes after the interview, I realized Rue didn't say anything that catchy or interesting. Just that she was married five times and was sewing a quilt when we spoke on the phone. So my article ended up in Q&A format which I HATE but my editor wanted it that way. I dunno--Q&A, to me, is aggrevating and looks like 'lazy' reporting.

I have Rue's home # again...now we are buds. Hehe. Riiight.

This guy, Evan, I went to Emerson with, is currently in a Dr. Pepper commercial. It's a really funny commercial. Everytime I see it, I laugh at Evan. He's also been in a Best Buy commercial and a Dr. Scholl's commercial. I guess he's getting steady work---Good for him. He wasn't the brainiest or most talented guy in college, but he was nice enough and it's cool to see him on TV.

OK time for bed.

This is gross

2005-05-22T06:08:00.000-07:00

I don't know what the hell is wrong with me but I had to poop 3 times in the middle of the night. That is so gross; sorry. An average person has a bowel movement once a day or once every two days. But last night I had stomache aches and woke up three times to go to the bathroom--not to pee--but to poop. Maybe something is wrong with my colon. I can't stop thinking about how weird that is.

I barely slept last night because after my third trip the bathroom, I just could NOT fall back asleep. So I crawled into my sister Alyssa's bed (I'm on Long Island this weekend) and decided to watch her TV. I just saw the WORST show on MTV. It was called, "Next." I was too lazy and tired to change the channel. Basically, a guy/girl meets 5 people of the opposite sex, individually. And when they are 'bored' with their date, they then say, "Next!" and a new 'date' comes out of a tacky MTV bus to be their date...then, just when you think this show can't get any more atrocious, the 'date' the guy or girl likes best has a choice...they can take $100 or another date with the 'dater.' Naturally, they all chose the money.

I hate television today. I just find today's TV nothing but silly crap. I really do. The only show I actually enoy is, "The Sopranos" and we all know it goes on hiatus for 5 years or whatever, at a time. I like, "Desperate Housewives," but I don't care if I miss an episode and I like, "Arrested Development" but I hardly get to watch it. Oh, and I like "The Ellen DeGenereous Show." That's basically it.

And my secret obsessionis "The Apprentice." It's a REALLY good show. Donald Trump gives good advice about making it in the real world and after you watch one episode you are addicted. Really. I swear. Look, I don't watch, "The Bachelor" or anything. Ick.

Since I moved into my tiny, current apartment, I made some important sacrifices in order to make my rent. Jackie and I do not have cable or TiVo or anything fun like that. We cannot afford it. Instead, we just have basic TV. At first, I was going crazy without E!, a channel I used to watch for hours on end. But now, I don't miss cable at all and am happier without it. I watch so much less TV and turn to books instead. If I had TiVo I would turn into a couch potato so I vow to never get it. It is healthier for me both mentally and physically to not sit on my butt all day watching TV. I get more reading and writing done. I get outside more often. Not having cable has been a blessing.

Same goes for magazines. I used to read all the celebrity smut: "US Weekly," "People," "Star," etc...they have a million crappy magazines out there with doctored pictures. I know how weird it is that I'm a magazine writer who is shying away from smutty mags, but I do mostly write health and wellness articles. Anyway, one day I was getting ready to buy, "In Touch Weekly" at a grocery store and the woman behind the counter looked at me, looked at the magazine, than looked back at me and said, "Aw, honey--You're smater than that."

I felt ashamed. She's right. I *am* smarter than "Us Weekly." I put the magazine back and since then I made a mental note to myself that I will no longer buy or read smutty tabloids. And I don't miss them at all. I sometimes read the celeb news on Cnn.com and on Yahoo! news, but that is IT and I am much happier. No stupid movie stars in my face. I WILL however buy "Hollywood Life" and "Vanity Fair," because I do love movies and want to read about upcoming movies, etc...not about who's dating who. Oh, and I like "Glamour." It has no real celeb gossip in it. But on my magazine shit list are: Life & Style, US, (most) issues of People who is still an OK magazine every 5 issues or so, In Touch Weekly, Star, and other tabloids.

I do continue to watch the regular broadcast news and read the newspaper, but no more smut mags for me! I feel better about myself too, shying away from "In Touch Weekly." When I flew to AZ two weeks ago, instead of buying a magazine at the airport, I just brought two books and my iPod on the plane with me. I feel--and this is going to sound funny--a little more educated and in touch with myself and the world without falling in Celebrityville. Go me. I deserve a freaking metal.

Okay, so...

2005-05-21T18:39:00.000-07:00

I have decided that I need to post more frequently in my Blogger.

My shrink thinks it's so weird that I don't keep a journal. You know, being a magazine writer and all. She also thinks it's weird that I don't write for pleasure. I can't help it. Very little inspires me.

My allergies are a nightmare. Allergies basically feel like someone poured mucus into your brain and you have to the sneeze it all out. Gross. I know, believe me. I am drowning in red eyes and mucus. Sexy, eh? Help me! I just stuck two Q-Tips up my nose. I can't take any meds because NOTHING works on me...Tavist D, Claritin, Tylenol Cold, etc...

So, its been over a month since Mike and I broke up. I'm actually loving this single life. I can make eye contact with some guy at a bar and just not feel guilty. Last night I let a guy buy me a drink and I don't have to feel guilty. I can be ME and just look within myself and focus on writing and just enjoy being Rachel. I miss Mike so much and I admit that--but you know what? I think I'm an OK gal and I know whatever happens, I'll land on my two feet. My two BIG feet.

But I do relapse. I had a crying fit Tuesday night because of how lonely I felt. NYC is VERY lonely. I stare out my window at the strangers walking by and I just feel so alone, so empty. I don't have a full-time job with benefits. I had to borrow $300 from my dad last month and I am KICKING myself for that. I don't have health insurance because I can't afford it which is why I am always sick. My best friend is talking marriage to her boyfriend and this is driving me crazy because she's my BEST FRIEND--she can't get married on me. You know? And my mom--dear God--always on my case. Always nagging me. Always reminding me that I'm just never good enough. To make matters worse, I pick fights with Jackie because I am jealous of her. That just makes me feel even worse.

Michael has been emailing me and IMing and we talk--and we did run into each other at the mall two weeks ago--but I will admit this... He IMed me on Thursday and said, "I'll give you a call this weekend." And while I am NOT waiting by the phone...(Right now I am in my parents basement and my cell phone is on vibrate in the kitchen and I CANNOT hear it) I know if I don't hear from him I'll be bummed. Then I will get over it.

But whatever. I'm doing alright. There are two ways I can tell that post-breakup I am doing OK. #1--I'm eating. When I am upset or stressed, I just have no appetite. But I have never altered my eating and still eat three meals a day and GET hungry, etc...and #2--I am able to easily live "in the moment." I can focus on my work without daydreaming about (insert guy's name here). I can focus on a movie and/or a book and recall the plot and the lines without thinking about _____. I can focus on my friends and family and really be, "in the present." That's great. That's a BIG sign that I am okay. And most importantly--I can laugh and MEAN it.

Amy and I went out last night with three of her guy friends and I had a lot of fun. I'm so glad I went out and had a chance to meet new people. Today Amanda and I went to the Brooklyn Museum than I took the train with her to Long Island. And tonight, I am stuffed with allergies. Fabulous.

Okay, I'm going to sleep. (Yes...sleep) because I am just so drowsy. Will update more soon! xoxo

UGH

2005-04-13T10:52:00.000-07:00

UGH, so not much is going on here except, gee, let's see...Mike and I broke up on Sunday. i am honestly doing OK because--let's face it--I spent 95 percent of my adult life completely single. So this whole single thing is not new to me. It's a bit of a relief, too, because now I can be memememememe again. At the same time, I'm hurting. I love Mike. So this one hurts, but it's a soothing hurt.

It was actually me who ended things with Michael, but we both saw this coming. Michael knew I was becoming frustrated with him, and on Sunday, I told him that he's been distant--and that I want more. If he can't be my boyfriend than I am not wasting my time. No matter how busy you are, if you truly, truly care about someone than you will scarifice to be with them. When we were talking, Michael said he wasn't ready to let me go--but he had to because right now he can't give me everything I want. I told him that I DESERVE a relationship and I DESERVE someone to love me, and he agreed and said that maybe we have a future but for now, we both need space. So....this is goodbye....for now. I'm truly bummed, but I will be okay. I'm a trooper. He said, "This isn't goodbye...I just need some space..." but to me, this is goodbye. I don't wait for any guy. If he wants me, he can come after me. Until then....(shrug)

So now I have immersed myself into my writing again, this time even stronger, and I am fighting the urge to call Mike. I want to call him at work and be like, 'So, what's up?" But I won't and don't worry, I'm NOT going to call him. I even put a sticker on my cell phone that says, DONT CALL MIKE and removed him from my phone and my Buddy List. Again...let him take some time to realize how great we were/are together...but I'm too smart to wait. It's hard--I was w/ Mikey for almost 6 months and he was also my buddy during that time. So I lost a 'relationship' as well as a friend. Sucks. I hate losing people I care about.

I am also back in therapy--and my new therapist is great! Her name is Kathy and she's young and very easy to talk to, and I cannot wait to work with a new therapist. I only wish I went back to therapy earlier.

Not much else is going on. I am home on Long Island today. I came out here to clear my head, but it's so hard considering Mike is FROM the same hometown as I am and comes to visit his parents as often as I visit mine. Jeez, I'm gonna run into him. This is going to be hard.

Never wear high heels for more than 5 hours

2005-04-04T14:50:00.000-07:00

UGH; Stressful, long, annoying day. My allergies are a mess. I keep sneezing every two minutes. The fridge in my apartment broke; all our food spoiled and our landlady is an asshole butlicker. The light blew out in my bathroom and we need a special bulb and the landlady gave us an attitude about fixing it. Bitch. I'm mad at Mike for ignorning me all of last week. My best friend moved to Florida yesterday. I have two giant blisters on my feet. I'm totally broke.

I'm going to take a nap.

Rachel, The Sex Therapist?????

2005-03-30T09:23:00.000-08:00

An editor asked me if I would be interested in writing a few "sex-themed" articles for her magazine. Oh my god--how funny is that? Rachel S*k*l, sex therapist? I really am quite the prude. For article #1, the editor wants me to interview a man who created a series of 'sexual fitness' videos for both men and women. My mom would have a kinna-hurra (That's yiddish for 'stroke' or 'heart attack') if she knew I was penning a sex column.

I told her OK, I'll do it. But this is a clip I will not show my parents.

On a different level, writing professionally is something I take very seriously. I would love to someday be published in, 'The New Yorker," or something just as classy. Do I really want my name affiliated with a sex magazine??????

Easter Sunday

2005-03-27T06:40:00.000-08:00

I've been home on Long Island since Friday afternoon. Honestly, I have not done much and can confess my siblings drive me crazy. But I love them. Dave and Lyss are at that teenager age when they're obsessed with MTV, the opposite sex and anything related to fashion. But overall, they're great kids. They just make me nuts when Jackie and I visit. Teenage angst. Been there.

Friday night I went out with Amanda just for drinks. We had one our marathon catch-up sessions. I hate going out on Long Island, but since my best friends all still live here, what choice do I have? She's doing well. She started dating a guy she really likes and I am happy for her. It is SO NICE to see one of my best friends so excited. It's really sad that Amanda and I both think we never deserve to be happy. And when we are happy, we think something bad will come and counteract our happiness.

Yesterday I sort of bummed around, worked on some articles and went to dinner with the parents. I wore jogging pants to dinner, a T-shirt and no make-up and the waitress thought I was 17! Jeez. I'm verging 26 and still get mistaken for a high-schooler. Yesterday I also called my great-gram for her birthday--she's 101! But it breaks my heart that she's so sick and had no idea who I was.

I finished "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time," which was an incredible novel told from the POV of a teenager with autism. A wave of sadness washes over me whenever I finish a great book because I'm jealous I didn't write it. My dream is to one day write a novel and lately I've been really pushing myself to continue working on manuscripts, etc. I miss being in an academic enviornment. I miss book clubs and creative writing classes. Once I have a more stable income, I'm going to look into continuing ed classes.

What else is up? Hmmmm...Oh, Mike is currently in my debt because I managed to get us Maroon 5 tickets at Radio City Music Hall. I don't know much about music, especially today's music, but I really like Maroon 5. (I have earned the respect of my brother because I like Maroon 5) I had to go through a broker, but through family connections, I got Mike and I tickets to the completely sold-out concert. I'm REALLY excited to go on April 6. I never go to concerts, ever. The last concert I went to was Madonna's last August and--I'm sorry--but it sucked.

I am feeling so much better about my situation with Mike, especially after he kindly sat me down and heard me out about all my feelings/anxieties when we spoke on Wednesday night. Old Rachel would have started apologizing for no reason and let her voice crack. She would have started stuttering and crying and making no sense. But the Rachel I'm slowly trying to adapt to is a lot more confident with herself. I am really proud of myself for being completely honest with Michael and opening up to him without being all meek. It's amazing what a little confidence can do to you. The best thing that came out my past relationships? The ability to be more honest with myself and with others.

My circle of friends is changing. I'm back in touch with Dina, a girl I used to work with. We lost touch but we started talking on IMs again and I'm so happy she is FINALLY responding to me. She went through a depression where she ignored everyone while she dealt with an abusive boyfriend (*sigh*...) and of course, I was incredibly worried about her and told her many times to please call me anytime she needs...well...a friend. And my best friend Jen is leaving for Florida for two months! She's doing community theatre down there. Two months without my best friend around...Gina is always around, of course, but she is so busy lately I feel so bad when I talk to her and she's exhausted at 7pm.

OK, I'm off to my grandmother's today, than back to NYC. I have a job interview tomorrow so I'll need to stop at Kinko's early tomorrow morning and bind my resume, clips and cover letter as I usually do. I REALLY need this job; so cross fingers!

Welcome Back

2005-03-04T21:33:00.000-08:00

I am BACK!!!!! My blog is back and will be better than ever!